Dear French Silk Pie,
I have loved you for a very long time, but our relationship has caused me to gain 20lbs. Therefore, I have decided to NEVER see you again! Well, ok, never is a harsh word, so only on special occasions, BUT THAT'S IT!!!
Your Friend,
BellyFat
I am seriously addicted to french silk pie, which is why I gained almost 40 lbs during pregnancy. I mean, I really didn't think I would have anything to worry about because I have never had a weight issue and could pretty much eat whatever I wanted, but now, it's a whole different ball game. Is there a chapter of FSPA (French Silk Pie Anonymous) available for hardcore addicts like myself? As I sit here and write this, my bellyfat is literally spilling over my pants, and I'm not even wearing tight ones!! Sometimes, I grab all that extra skin and fat and mush it together and pretend like it's saying, "French silk pie! French silk pie!" in a creepy little voice. It normally makes me feel better, you know, to make-fun of my insecurities (note the sarcasm), but today it is having little effect and I am plunging deeper into depression where my addiction gets the best of me.
Thus, due to my serious muffin top-or I should say, whipped topping (only because french silk pie is topped with creamy deliciousness and that is what contributed to my love handles), I have given myself 8 weeks to get back into shape. I want to be in amazing shape. I'm talking Jillian Michaels shape. I want to be HOT! I want to be a MILF! I think 8 weeks is plenty enough time to firm up my abs that were stretched like Gumbi and my ass and thighs that have now been donned "Cellulite City," don't you? Please tell me if I am absolutely crazy. I am a mom on a mission and I have never been so motivated to sweat in my whole life! And, speaking of Jillian Michaels, I am going to try her "30 Day Shred." I have heard nothing but positive things about her program and I seriously hope it works! So friends, here goes nothing. I am tempted to post pictures of the progress, however, I don't want to subject anyone to such disturbing images. But, then again, maybe I do. Show it to your teenage daughters, it'd be great birth control!
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Hahaha...you go, girl!!
ReplyDeleteIt is totally possible to get the weight off in 8 weeks, especially if you are breastfeeding! Eat a lot of high fiber foods, that will help you so much. I have a recipe for bran muffins that are saving my life right now. I can't get full unless I eat something hearty like bran cereal or muffins. If you like brown rice, cook a big pot of it and have it in your fridge so that you can eat a cup of it when you don't feel satisfied. It's low in calories and will help curve your hunger until your stomach stretches back down. Sorry to write a novel on here, I'm just one of those "hippie," as my husband calls me, moms that does all the natural crap lol.
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